Clueless Horny Dom Wannabe (CHDW) also known as Fake Dom or Tumblr Dom

Our Definition

A disparaging term for someone who has recently joined the kink community, usually online, seeking sex partners, often displaying disrespectful behavior, such as the expectation that s-types to submit to them just because they call themselves a Dominant. 

Real Life Examples

Kyle is a jerk to his girlfriend. He thinks this makes him dominant. It does not.

Bradley sends messages to strangers on the internet and expects automatic submission, without first doing any negotiating, nor acquiring consent. Bradley is an Asshole. Don’t be like Bradley.

Common Practices

Everyone is different (Even jerks)! You'll see this repeated throughout our website and glossary. Common Fake Dom practices include, but certainly aren't limited to:
  • Being rude and presumptuous 
  • A level of cluelessness about real life and how a power exchange dynamic could realistically be incorporated into one’s real life (I.e. “You won’t be allowed clothes and you will sleep in a dog bed, because I say so” [ never mind that you have a full time job where clothing is expected, and a health condition that would be worsened by sleeping on a dog bed.])

Got a beef with our definition?

Of course we don't speak for everyone! If you feel we are missing additional info, context, facts, history, or data, please email us and let us know!

While we can't promise every suggestion will make it, we'll always be working to keep this glossary thorough and inclusive!